Oh how I YEARN to hear that line!!!
Ever since 'Aaj Tak' joined the 24*7 news bandwagon, it has pioneered the use of crass hype as a means of creating headlines.
And the worst part is that we are forced to watch these 'Breaking News' during lunch. It so happens that the bumbling canteen contractor has taken a fancy for India's answer to CNN. Probably we wrote too many caustic complaints in the Suggestion Book and this is his way of getting back. Whatever may be the reason, all 12 TVs in the canteen broadcast 'Aaj Tak' throughout the day!
And this was yesterday's feature story. They telecast programs with names like 'Sansani!' and 'Khauff!' during the afternoon lunch hours (and the names are quite self expanatory - on the lines of m/s Ramsay Bros & co.). The head line said "Ayyash Bauna Chor" (which translates into Fun-loving Dwarf Thief)!!!!!!!
And the best part is it was accompanied by a 15 minute story, with interviews of eye-witnesses and cinematic recreation too!!! WOW!!!
Saturday, August 25, 2007
Monday, August 20, 2007
Down and out
For the past whole week, actually 8 days in all, I've been nursing a sore throat. To give that company, came a bout of cold last wednesday. Since then, I've been trying to fend off this double trouble... and simply put, it is debilitating and IRRITATING now!!!!!!!!!
A blissful day...
Ok... So here are the explanations :)
Last weekend was my best friend A's birthday... We've been buddies since engineering. And I have this terrible problem with dates, especially birthdays. I just CANNOT remember them, even close family's... (with a tinge of shame, I've gotta admit the only birthday I remember is my own).
So, I had been planning for a while to do something nice on that day. I planned to connive with his girlfriend. And the two of us set forth gathering other conspirators for D-day.
All our intricate plans were in place. She planned to meet him later in the day like she normally would have. I called him at 12AM like I normally should have, and spun a long yarn about being stuck in Pune due to office on saturday (HA!!! He fell for that one, cause it's true at times).
But alas!! Not many were free to attend the culmination of this conspiracy for the simple fact that no one was in town that day, so it was left to me, his girlfriend R and his school buddy J. To add confusion to complication, I got delayed in reaching the rendezvous. Eventually, the three of us landed up at his doorstep, cake in hand and the camera rolling...
SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!
A remains transfixed as he sees R, Me and J outside his door, with his sister in on this whole thing... He hates to admit this, but he was Totally suprprised!!!! :)
After the ritual cake-cutting, we gorged on auntie's Idli-Sambhar (gosh it was like manna!). Joke's, food, friends and some internet made it one memorable afternoon. Spontaneously we decided to watch a movie... Chak-De India it was. Fortunately, cause Bollywood usually behaves truant, it turned out to be a great movie...
For A it was a surprise, and R loved it too...
For my part, I could'nt contain the joy of meeting A & R after such a long time... We 3 and other friends have been together for the last 4 years in the same class, and then I used to take everyone's presence for granted.
It's only now, when I am away, bereft of their company... After losing someone do you understand their worth... I've learnt it the hard way. So I've always been the one who forgot to come, the one who forgot to call, the one who was never there... I want to change that, I want to let my loved one's know that I do care... These were my first steps to make amends, to implement what I have learnt... the hard way.
Last weekend was my best friend A's birthday... We've been buddies since engineering. And I have this terrible problem with dates, especially birthdays. I just CANNOT remember them, even close family's... (with a tinge of shame, I've gotta admit the only birthday I remember is my own).
So, I had been planning for a while to do something nice on that day. I planned to connive with his girlfriend. And the two of us set forth gathering other conspirators for D-day.
All our intricate plans were in place. She planned to meet him later in the day like she normally would have. I called him at 12AM like I normally should have, and spun a long yarn about being stuck in Pune due to office on saturday (HA!!! He fell for that one, cause it's true at times).
But alas!! Not many were free to attend the culmination of this conspiracy for the simple fact that no one was in town that day, so it was left to me, his girlfriend R and his school buddy J. To add confusion to complication, I got delayed in reaching the rendezvous. Eventually, the three of us landed up at his doorstep, cake in hand and the camera rolling...
SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!
A remains transfixed as he sees R, Me and J outside his door, with his sister in on this whole thing... He hates to admit this, but he was Totally suprprised!!!! :)
After the ritual cake-cutting, we gorged on auntie's Idli-Sambhar (gosh it was like manna!). Joke's, food, friends and some internet made it one memorable afternoon. Spontaneously we decided to watch a movie... Chak-De India it was. Fortunately, cause Bollywood usually behaves truant, it turned out to be a great movie...
For A it was a surprise, and R loved it too...
For my part, I could'nt contain the joy of meeting A & R after such a long time... We 3 and other friends have been together for the last 4 years in the same class, and then I used to take everyone's presence for granted.
It's only now, when I am away, bereft of their company... After losing someone do you understand their worth... I've learnt it the hard way. So I've always been the one who forgot to come, the one who forgot to call, the one who was never there... I want to change that, I want to let my loved one's know that I do care... These were my first steps to make amends, to implement what I have learnt... the hard way.
Monday, August 13, 2007
Blisssss
The past Saturday was one of the most memorable days of my life!!! Rarely, does one get to feel utter bliss... [:)]
Thursday, August 9, 2007
'Puneri Patya'
So the legend continues...
For the uninitiated, Puneites, the denizens of the historic city of Pune, are known for their curtness and acidity of speech, only when you get on their nerves (that's my escape route if a Pukka Punekar reads this). And this terrific causticness of speech and thought, manifests itself in the form of information signposts, or 'paatya', as we call them in Marathi, that Punekar's put up in their shops or homes or from wherever they ply their trade.
There are an immense number of these doing the rounds in e-mails, which makes me doubt their authenticity. But this one I saw myself, and could help but give a wry chuckle at what must have motivated the author to say somehting so absolutely mean!
It goes like this:
At Parvati, the mountain-top palace abode of the Peshwas, the earstwhile rulers of Pune, is now a heritage structure. It houses the main Palace with the central temple, and outside the sqaure ramparts are other smaller associated structures. One of them is, quite predictably, converted into the Peshwe Museum. As you walk out of the exit to this structure, there is an entrance to your left, barred by a metal door with a smaller door serving as the sole opening. It is used as office quarters for the trustees or administrators of the place.
Now, this could have been easily stated in simple words asking people to stay out, but nay... in 'assall' Puneri tradition, a signboard hung on the door says "Aat baghynasarkhe kahi hi nahi ahe, tyamule aat dokavu suddha naye" (There is nothing to be seen in here, so don't even try to peek in)!!!
For the uninitiated, Puneites, the denizens of the historic city of Pune, are known for their curtness and acidity of speech, only when you get on their nerves (that's my escape route if a Pukka Punekar reads this). And this terrific causticness of speech and thought, manifests itself in the form of information signposts, or 'paatya', as we call them in Marathi, that Punekar's put up in their shops or homes or from wherever they ply their trade.
There are an immense number of these doing the rounds in e-mails, which makes me doubt their authenticity. But this one I saw myself, and could help but give a wry chuckle at what must have motivated the author to say somehting so absolutely mean!
It goes like this:
At Parvati, the mountain-top palace abode of the Peshwas, the earstwhile rulers of Pune, is now a heritage structure. It houses the main Palace with the central temple, and outside the sqaure ramparts are other smaller associated structures. One of them is, quite predictably, converted into the Peshwe Museum. As you walk out of the exit to this structure, there is an entrance to your left, barred by a metal door with a smaller door serving as the sole opening. It is used as office quarters for the trustees or administrators of the place.
Now, this could have been easily stated in simple words asking people to stay out, but nay... in 'assall' Puneri tradition, a signboard hung on the door says "Aat baghynasarkhe kahi hi nahi ahe, tyamule aat dokavu suddha naye" (There is nothing to be seen in here, so don't even try to peek in)!!!
Wednesday, August 8, 2007
Crass-h
Saw a movie after a looong time... and it was my misfortune that it happened to be 'Cash'. That, well, is a new Hindi movie...
Well, the title says it all... It's not about Cash, it's simply Crass!!!
Never have I seen such a phenomenal waste of money on inconsequential beautification of 90mm of celluloid.
It all starts of with a garish song sequence, with the 5 actors I expected to be on screen... Za-'yeda' Khan, Rit-shit Deshmukh, 'Sham'-ita Shitty and the veteran actor Ajay Have-gun. And proceeds to a plane with Za-yeda being the only passenger in the business class with the human quesstionnaire Ayesha Takia (what is she doing here???). Then starts The Story, of, very predictably, a diamond heist. Za-yeda Khan goes on to explain (again, why go through that trouble???) how The Veteran lives differant identities. During the day he is a poetic husband to Sham-ita Shitty. Btw, Miss Sham is an explosive cop in Cape Town. It seems the CT PD are allowed to wear skimpy tops and tight pants to office (It's the heat I presume, its Africa afterall!). At night, he is a high profile thief (funny he never seems to actually do anything, yet lives in a posh condo and drives a Ford Mustang, and his cop wife doesnt suspect shit, Great!!!)
Then there is the part where a mystery lady Bujha-Diya Mirza walks in, as lacklustre as an extinguished lamp. For some unexplained reason, she has been asking The Veteran to recite the same old Santa-Banta joke every time she meets him (??????). She is The Moll, to The Villian - Suniel super-Shitty(now now, he was out slimming, wasn't he?). The Villian has a terrifically enticing accent when he speaks Shakespear's tongue, so much so that his own uncle (and the Uncle is Swedish - ???) can't understand squat of what is being said. A murderous misunderstanding ensues.
After The Main Boneheads are introduced, a song is used to unveil the star att-crap-tion...Esha Deol! Over the past few years, as she developed a flatter tummy, she has started getting an allergy for clothes that cover her tummy. The director obliged and she doesnt get to wear much in the movie (lucky Esha, at last, the flat tummy and other such womanly assets can be shown). But my oh my, we can only admire at the awesome built. Her pics must be put up in all gyms alongside Arnold and the other hideously musceled men. Her biceps are as big as, say, Bret 'Hitman' Hart of old. And her shoulders are what men strive to achieve even after years of hardcore gymming.
Well, then there is something explained about who Za-yeda Khan and Rit-shit Deshmukh actually are. And then something happens which I really did not understand. All I registered is a bizarre series of French Bank robberies, police chasing Esha Deol, The Villian trying to clear the misunderstanding (again in the weird accent which does not help), some unneccessarily expensive stunts, and when the money fell short, some goofy animationin place.
And suddenly, we come to the end. To cut it short (basically I did not understand anything else), The Villian double crosses the rest and kills The Moll. So the remaining renegades hunt him using an F-1 car, a 500cc Bike and 2 road sledges (that speed on curvy roads like they had turn control????????). And The Veteran, eventually shoots The Villian.
What I took back:
1. How do bollywood directors spend big money on only action stunt scenes, in a movie with no story, no script, no scope for performance and no semblance of a plot???
2. The reason Bujha-Diya Mirza keeps wanting to hear the joke is that The Veteran is sooo bad with dialogue delivery, that till the end, NO ONE in the theatre understood what was the last line of the joke.
3. What does Esha Deol have to do to prove she is a WOMAN????????????
4. Don't ever, I always remind myself, DONT EVER watch such garish movies again.
Well, the title says it all... It's not about Cash, it's simply Crass!!!
Never have I seen such a phenomenal waste of money on inconsequential beautification of 90mm of celluloid.
It all starts of with a garish song sequence, with the 5 actors I expected to be on screen... Za-'yeda' Khan, Rit-shit Deshmukh, 'Sham'-ita Shitty and the veteran actor Ajay Have-gun. And proceeds to a plane with Za-yeda being the only passenger in the business class with the human quesstionnaire Ayesha Takia (what is she doing here???). Then starts The Story, of, very predictably, a diamond heist. Za-yeda Khan goes on to explain (again, why go through that trouble???) how The Veteran lives differant identities. During the day he is a poetic husband to Sham-ita Shitty. Btw, Miss Sham is an explosive cop in Cape Town. It seems the CT PD are allowed to wear skimpy tops and tight pants to office (It's the heat I presume, its Africa afterall!). At night, he is a high profile thief (funny he never seems to actually do anything, yet lives in a posh condo and drives a Ford Mustang, and his cop wife doesnt suspect shit, Great!!!)
Then there is the part where a mystery lady Bujha-Diya Mirza walks in, as lacklustre as an extinguished lamp. For some unexplained reason, she has been asking The Veteran to recite the same old Santa-Banta joke every time she meets him (??????). She is The Moll, to The Villian - Suniel super-Shitty(now now, he was out slimming, wasn't he?). The Villian has a terrifically enticing accent when he speaks Shakespear's tongue, so much so that his own uncle (and the Uncle is Swedish - ???) can't understand squat of what is being said. A murderous misunderstanding ensues.
After The Main Boneheads are introduced, a song is used to unveil the star att-crap-tion...Esha Deol! Over the past few years, as she developed a flatter tummy, she has started getting an allergy for clothes that cover her tummy. The director obliged and she doesnt get to wear much in the movie (lucky Esha, at last, the flat tummy and other such womanly assets can be shown). But my oh my, we can only admire at the awesome built. Her pics must be put up in all gyms alongside Arnold and the other hideously musceled men. Her biceps are as big as, say, Bret 'Hitman' Hart of old. And her shoulders are what men strive to achieve even after years of hardcore gymming.
Well, then there is something explained about who Za-yeda Khan and Rit-shit Deshmukh actually are. And then something happens which I really did not understand. All I registered is a bizarre series of French Bank robberies, police chasing Esha Deol, The Villian trying to clear the misunderstanding (again in the weird accent which does not help), some unneccessarily expensive stunts, and when the money fell short, some goofy animationin place.
And suddenly, we come to the end. To cut it short (basically I did not understand anything else), The Villian double crosses the rest and kills The Moll. So the remaining renegades hunt him using an F-1 car, a 500cc Bike and 2 road sledges (that speed on curvy roads like they had turn control????????). And The Veteran, eventually shoots The Villian.
What I took back:
1. How do bollywood directors spend big money on only action stunt scenes, in a movie with no story, no script, no scope for performance and no semblance of a plot???
2. The reason Bujha-Diya Mirza keeps wanting to hear the joke is that The Veteran is sooo bad with dialogue delivery, that till the end, NO ONE in the theatre understood what was the last line of the joke.
3. What does Esha Deol have to do to prove she is a WOMAN????????????
4. Don't ever, I always remind myself, DONT EVER watch such garish movies again.
Monday, August 6, 2007
"Everyday"...
I am not at all of a poetic bent of mind, heck, I can't even appreciate poetry of nay sort! But I am a lyrics freak, i.e., I do appreciate the lyrics of music, besides, of course, the music itself.
So, while rummaging through my over sized underutilized song collection, I cam across this Bon Jovi song. I never was particularly interested in him or his music, but this one song struck a chord. Not for the music or rhythm, but plainly for the lyrics. I just felt that if I wanted to pen down my thoughts, try and describe myself, and if only I was gifted in poetry, well, this would be IT. The song's called "Everyday".
"I used to be the kind of guy
Who'd never let you look inside
I'd smile when I was crying
I had nothing but a life to loose
Thought I had a lot to proof
In my life, there's no denying
Goodbye to all my yesterdays
Goodbye, so long, I'm on my way
I've had enough of cryin'
Bleedin', sweatin', dyin'
Hear me when I say
Gonna live my life everyday
I'm gonna touch the sky
And I spread these wings and fly
I ain't here to play
I'm gonna live my life everyday
Change, everybody's feeling strange
Never gonna be the same
Makes you wonder how the world keeps turning
Life, learning how to live my life
Learning how to pick my fights
Take my shots while I'm still burning
Goodbye to all those rainy nights
Goodbye, so long, I'm moving on
I've had enough of cryin'
Bleedin', sweatin', dyin'
Hear me when I say
Gonna live my life everyday
I'm gonna touch the sky
And I spread these wings and fly
I ain't here to play
I'm gonna live my life everyday
Hit the gas, take the wheel
I've just made myself a deal
There ain't nothing gonna get in my way
Everyday
Goodbye, so long, I'm moving on
I've had enough of cryin'
Bleedin', sweatin', dyin'
Hear me when I say
Gonna live my life everyday
I'm gonna touch the sky
And I spread these wings and fly
I ain't here to play
I'm gonna live my life everyday
I, oh I, oh I, I'm gonna live my life everyday
I (gonna touch the sky), oh I (spread these wings and fly), oh I
I'm gonna live my life everyday"
So, while rummaging through my over sized underutilized song collection, I cam across this Bon Jovi song. I never was particularly interested in him or his music, but this one song struck a chord. Not for the music or rhythm, but plainly for the lyrics. I just felt that if I wanted to pen down my thoughts, try and describe myself, and if only I was gifted in poetry, well, this would be IT. The song's called "Everyday".
"I used to be the kind of guy
Who'd never let you look inside
I'd smile when I was crying
I had nothing but a life to loose
Thought I had a lot to proof
In my life, there's no denying
Goodbye to all my yesterdays
Goodbye, so long, I'm on my way
I've had enough of cryin'
Bleedin', sweatin', dyin'
Hear me when I say
Gonna live my life everyday
I'm gonna touch the sky
And I spread these wings and fly
I ain't here to play
I'm gonna live my life everyday
Change, everybody's feeling strange
Never gonna be the same
Makes you wonder how the world keeps turning
Life, learning how to live my life
Learning how to pick my fights
Take my shots while I'm still burning
Goodbye to all those rainy nights
Goodbye, so long, I'm moving on
I've had enough of cryin'
Bleedin', sweatin', dyin'
Hear me when I say
Gonna live my life everyday
I'm gonna touch the sky
And I spread these wings and fly
I ain't here to play
I'm gonna live my life everyday
Hit the gas, take the wheel
I've just made myself a deal
There ain't nothing gonna get in my way
Everyday
Goodbye, so long, I'm moving on
I've had enough of cryin'
Bleedin', sweatin', dyin'
Hear me when I say
Gonna live my life everyday
I'm gonna touch the sky
And I spread these wings and fly
I ain't here to play
I'm gonna live my life everyday
I, oh I, oh I, I'm gonna live my life everyday
I (gonna touch the sky), oh I (spread these wings and fly), oh I
I'm gonna live my life everyday"
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